04.05.06

Alot of people reminisce how birthdays used to be so much fun.

Cakes were a treat, presents appeared by the dozens, and feelings were so magical.

As one grows more "mature", cakes become hazardous to ones diet, presents disappears to just two (including the one present you bought yourself) and feelings are overwhelmed with dread.

It's time to overcome that and cherish every birthday with open arms.
Let's face it. There's no way one can stop growing older. So if you can't beat it, join it!

So on my birthday (04.05.06)*hint*hint*, I wish for world peace (I've got a part to play in saving the world, haven't I?) and to age gracefully with joyfulness as my outlook, and wisdom as my inner strength.

SYMPTOMS OF BEING OVER 25

1. You leave clubs before the end to "beat the rush".

2. You get more excited about having a roast on a Sunday than going clubbing.

3. You stop dreaming of becoming a professional footballer and start dreaming of having a son who might instead.

4. Before throwing the local paper away, you look through the property section.

6. All of a sudden, Tony Blair is not 46, he's only 46.

7. Before going out anywhere, you ask what the parking is like.

8. Rather than throw a knackered pair of trainers out, you keep them because they'll be all right for the garden.

9. You buy your first ever T-shirt without anything written on it.

10. Instead of laughing at the innovations catalogue that falls out of the newspaper, you suddenly see both the benefit and money saving properties of a plastic winter cover for your garden bench and an electronic mole repellent for the lawn.

11. You start to worry about your parents' health.

12. You complain that ecstasy's "not as pure as it used to be coz you know that if you have some it will take about 48 hours to recover and anyway, you might look a bit of an idiot.

13. You don't get funny looks when you buy a Disney video or a Wallace and Gromit bubble bath, as the sales assistant assumes they are for your child.

14. Pop music all starts to sound crap.

15. You become powerless to resist the lure of self-assembly furniture.

16. The benefits of a pension scheme become clear.

17. You wish you had a shed.

18. You have a shed.

19. You actually find yourself saying "They don't make 'em like that anymore" and "I remember when there were only 3 TV channels" and "Of course(c)(c)in my day...."

20. Instead of tutting at old people who take ages to get off the bus, you tut at schoolchildren whose diction is poor.

21. When sitting outside a pub you become envious of their hanging baskets.

22. You come face to face with your own mortality for the first time, and the indestructibility of the 20s gives way to a realisation that you are but passing through this life and if you don't settle down soon and have kids you'll have no-one to look after you when you're old and frail and incontinent and you can't go on p**sing your life up against a wall forever and think of how many brain cells you're destroying every time a swift half turns into 10 pints, and look at that, a full set of stainless steel saucepans for 99 quid, they cost as much as 35 each if you buy them separately, and you get a milk pan thrown in, ...

23. You find yourself saying "is it cold in here or is it just me?"